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MRW a customer brings in an item that I don’t know much about

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MRW I hear anyone say biscuit.

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MRW I try to covertly leave work party

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MRW I see a girl out in public.

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MRW I see Xerxes

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MRW I get a king-sized bed to myself

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MRW my girlfriend walks from the kitchen wearing nothing but an apron.

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MRW when Trump says something insane and then later says he was just being sarcastic

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I have all of my group chats on “Do Not Disturb”. I rarely participate. This accurately describes how I feel about them. …They know.

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